Naughty? Yes. Nice? No!

The so-called Satanic Santa was not always such a devil. He was just a cute li'l Santa doll when Ralph's grandma bought him many years ago. But the legend goes that one day a pack of wild dogs nibbled the little fellas plastic fingers off, turning him (like so many supervillains) to the dark side!

"The Satanic Santa LOVES you!" rasps the dirty doll. Ralph's brought him to work and many parties. Most people hate (let's say fear) him. But he's my buddy! I wrote a song about him once.

When Ralph traveled to Europe, he carried a photo of Santa with him. There's pics of ol' SS in Rome, fer crying out loud!

The Bronx Gobbler

Ralph's father illustrates the "pre-carve dangling" technique of turkey preparation. What a bird!

I imagine it was quite a feast. Young Ralph was probably off in other room eating a pie!

Happy Thanksgiving to Fuccillos past, present and future!

A Toast to the Newlyweds!

December 17, 1971, Mt. Fuji Inn, Omaha, Nebraska. Ralph & Jan's rehearsal dinner, let's assume (until I get it from the horse's (or donkey's) mouth). Another wild gathering of associates to celebrate the soon-to-be Fuccillos. There's Big Red (John Regan) to the left of Jan.

The Classy Glass

1966: In a suit as sparkly as his glass of beer, our fresh-faced author attends the Cardinal Hayes graduation party with his classmate and associate, Mike Noone. The location is Marta's Italian Restaurant in Greenwich Village. Ralph's father knew the owner, as he used to provide meat to the kitchen. Besides Fuccillo, Marta's was a favorite hangout of John Dos Passos.

The Return of Richard Nixon

Ralph Fuccillo, photojournalist and Young Republican, snapped this iconic photograph of President Nixon on the campaign trail at the Westchester County Center in White Plains, NY. The photo's dated April 1971, so it's probably from late '70, early '71. Unless our boy was too cheap to develop the film in '68, when Nixon was there to open his NY campaign. So this shot is probably from his reelection bid.

Flash forward to November 12, 2010 at the The Artistery in Portland, Oregon, where his son Jeff's band, Helll are performing. Ralph encounters his hero once again. Now someone needs to paint a HUGE propaganda-like portrait of Big Pops!

Good Evening, Ladies & Germs!

1970: A white sports coat and a pink ruffled cuff. What an outfit! Here Ralph's dressed as the Insult Comic Dog -- cigar and all! I was most surprised that the event was Creighton's Senior Dance and not a talent show. Jan is, of course, dressed appropriately, but Ralph's ready to "Make a Deal!"